One year, two weeks, and the Light

On January 10th, I had my first joint surgery and my blog turned a year old! I am so happy that, a year ago, I got brave and started this blog. I have always loved writing my thoughts, but never shared it with anyone. While my blog isn’t big, I know that it has reached people. That was my goal. If something I wrote could encourage just one person in the Lord, I would be satisfied.

Almost two weeks ago, I had hip surgery. I am so happy because, since day three post-op, my pain has been better than it was before surgery! That is huge and incredible! We are praising the Lord and so thankful. Now, I am working at being able to walk again. I am thrilled beyond words that recovery is going so well and I am over here dreaming of walking well again. It has been wayyyyy too long since I have been able to walk without support or pain. I never realized how much I took walking for granted!

The funny thing is, I am using a walker since I can’t fully weight bare since surgery. When people see a sixteen-year-old with a walker, you’d better believe they are gonna stare! Sometimes, it bothers me, but then I realize, it doesn’t matter! I get to move, and that alone is a blessing. So I am choosing to smile when people stare and embrace the walker because it is an amazing tool that keeps me mobile. But, I refuse to put tennis balls on the back! That is where I draw the line! 😉

So, for now, life is as settled as it seems to get around here. We are settling into a routine of school and therapy. I know that it will change again soon, and I am ok with that because that will mean that I have to do less physical therapy and be more mobile!

Lately, amid my crazy happiness that has me nearly floating, I have also seen people suffering sorrow beyond belief. Dear people that I know world’s turned upside down and inside out. Other peoples’ lives marked by physical suffering that never seems to end. No matter how well according to my plan things are going, there is always something heavy and sad too. My heart is burdened for these people who are suffering. I am sobered, but I also know something that has completely changed my view. God is sovereign. In these unimaginable circumstances, in these dark places, God is working. He is working for His glory and our ultimate good. He is sovereign over all things, and because of that and the fact that He loves us and works all things together for our good, we know that we never suffer in vain. None of our suffering is wasted. God has a purpose, though my vision is often too small and marked by selfishness to see it.

In this darkness that seems to be all around, I am reminded of the lyrics to Is He Worthy by Andrew Peterson.

Do you know that all the dark won’t stop the light from getting through?

Andrew Peterson, Is He Worthy

Darkness never stops light- it only makes it brighter and more beautiful. Darkness makes us long for the Light. We see and feel the suffering and darkness of this world, and we long for the Light. We learn to hope for the Light. The more we long and hope for the Light, the more we reflect it.

A sweet friend of mine, Alexa, is an incredibly talented artist who captures the essence of beauty in the darkness well, especially in her last blog post “I’d Like to Learn to Love it Anyway.” Here is the link: She has helped me see something; beauty can come from pain. Her paintings reflect it, her blog reflects it, and she reflects it.

We all know pain, but we all know beauty as well. We tend to separate them, but should we? Take the Gospel, for example, Christ’s death was the most painful thing I can think of- but it is also more beautiful than anything I can ever imagine. The Maker of all things, dying on a cross as a criminal, in place of sinners because He loved them. But we all know the story, death could not hold Him, He conquered it. You can’t get much more beautiful than that!

To sum this blog post up: I am doing incredibly well after surgery and we are really thankful. My blog is a year old! Suffering is ever-present in this world and it is sobering. At the same time, we know that God does not allow suffering to be wasted. The dark only makes the light brighter. Also, go check out Alexa’s blog and incredible artwork! 😉 Thank you for joining me in my ridiculously squirrelly blog post and have a blessed evening! 😉


This is my journey as I try to live life for the glory of the Lord with EDS!

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